They Are Zombies .. They Are Neighbors ..

Yeah, I know I’m late, but The Mike Stand has to fight off those post-Labor Day blues too!

Anyway …

Haverhill’s Rob Zombie is the king of the movie box office right now — his re-imagining of the horror classic “Halloween” took in an astounding $31 Million over the Labor Day weekend. That’s a new record, and once again sets the record straight on America’s taste in film — we have none!

Okay, that’s a little harsh (it’s that post-Labor Day thing again), but you have to admit the horror-sleaze market is a pretty lucrative one. Zombie knows it, and don’t underestimate that guy’s business chops. He makes movies the same way he makes music — fast, dark and bankable. He leaves the highbrow stuff to the college chumps. Zombie doesn’t care about art or creative integrity, that’s far too risky. Instead, he picks lowball schlock, fancies it up a bit so he can call himself an auteur, and serves it up with faux state of the art efficiency. He even got the Weinstein brothers to pick up the distribution tab (maybe they thought of “Halloween” as a cross between “Shakespeare in Love” and “Pulp Fiction”) — one thing’s for sure they know a meal ticket when they see one.

So, now Rob’s talking about two more installments of his “Halloween” brainstorm. Hey, it’s steady work for his wife Sheri and his horror-stock regulars. Nice that Malcolm McDowell’s been added to the mix. How many actors can claim Stanley Kubrick, Bob Guccione, and Rob Zombie as directors? Maybe that will be a daily double question on “Jeopardy” one day. Zombie meanwhile will have to spend countless minutes regurgitating old scripts, how tiresome. He’s just the chef though, we’re the zombies lined up for the buffet.

As my friend Sufjan would say — “Ahhhh!”


There are no comments on this post.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: