Block Heads

I know, I know it’s a girl thing.

Even so, I’m still a little stunned at the squeals of delight for the return of The New Kids On The Block — did you really miss these guys that much? I mean judging by the enraptured throngs who flocked to the “Today” show this morning you’d think a reunion of some great musical import was taking place. Nope. Sorry. Just the pre-fab lugs from Boston, bringing the stool and bucket out to a weary looking cash cow.

It’s all harmless, silly, nostalgia sure, but this is one group that should have just let it lie. Some cheese tastes better after aging but not the NKOTB brand. I mean where’s your dignity guys? Your songs were all processed pop goo. You posed. You preened. You tried to stay in key. Now your gonna cut some new tracks? Oh, the horror.

What in god’s name are they going to sing about? The New Kids actually have kids now. How about a funky number about packin’ the kids in the SUV for soccer practice? I’m sorry, but grown men cannot sing NKOTB songs with a straight face. Have a ball though dudes, the tour will probably be a smash, just make sure you go on by 7:30 and finish by 9:15. Babysitters are costing your fan base a fortune.


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